Fluctuations.

So many things yet to learn.

So many things yet to discover.

I'm just 20 years old.

There's too many things in my mind which is irrelevant.

There's nothing for me to lose at this stage.

Sometimes we think too much,

We get scared of the things we do not know.

I always say that I think too much,

But really, to be honest, I don't really know how to solve my problems.

At one point, I had this urge to blog, to blog so many things that happened.

I wish I could list it out all the things out here and explain what is it about.

But things, they, they just disappear so fast.

It didn't allow me to stay put and slowly decipher the things that happened.

I guess to really do this I need a map,

A map of the things that I value, what I need, what I want and to map it all out,

So that, I can live my life accordingly.

You are embarked on a journey that you do not understand.

Of all the sufferings of the world that you don't know much about,

Out of the sudden when you are on this journey,

You begin to find that this is way bigger than what you originally planned.

You wish to do great things but you're scared.

You begin to do something that you don't want to do.

You just want to get rid of it.

It's a responsibility.

But I guess, this responsibility has its price. You sacrifice for the greater good.

You wish to just stay back to your comfort zone but because of the circumstances, you have to get out of it.

Lucky to have someone by your side, but sometimes they do not understand even though they are right and also providing you all the confidence you needed. 

Sometimes you just need someone that understands your pain.

People come and go but what is important is that you do what you need to do.

I believe, once the journey has ended, you will never be the same again because how can you go back to the life where it once was, some hurts that goes too deep, you begin to realise that there's no turning back.

What I learned in church yesterday was really compelling.

Gift/Talent produces service.

Service produces credibility.

Credibility produces influence.

Influence produces change.

Change produces atmosphere.

Atmosphere produces seed.

Seed produces fruit.

Fruit produces dominion.

All of these surrounded by the work of love

You need to find your gift to bring service. This service is not slavery but out of love to serve with the need to have credibility in order to have influence. Because, without credibility you will not have an influence. This influence is important to have change you want to see in this world. Everyone talks about change but without putting your gifts and talents to service which then produces credibility and then influence, you will not have change. This change we see creates an atmosphere. This atmosphere is where everybody would see this change and from there a seed is put into their lives and this seed can then produces fruit. This fruit that it has become, is dominion.